Memories shift, haze
like grains of sand dispersing –
sentiments heart set.
(For RonovanWrites Weekly Haiku Challenge: haze/sand. Image from personal collection.)
Memories shift, haze
like grains of sand dispersing –
sentiments heart set.
(For RonovanWrites Weekly Haiku Challenge: haze/sand. Image from personal collection.)
Novice, a word that negates
experience, knowledge, merit –
capability under suspicion.
I novice myself frequently,
as if vulnerability is a sideline
and humility commands denigration.
A tired and weary state –
yes, this is me, new and willing
to learn, but I am not novice.
So before you judge, adjust
your professional spectacles,
snub my potential, hear this:
Value is immeasurable –
unique contributions
enhance collective offerings.
(Reena’s Exploration challenge this week is based on “The Story of An Hour” which challenges us to examine our life and limitations. I dream over and over again that I have returned to teaching only to find that the years I have put in have been negated by my absence and I have to begin again. Starting over is not a new theme in my life, but my attitude about is finally changing, as represented in the poem. Image from personal collection.)
Paint, we vowed,
would negate the haunting,
make the house our own –
selected with care:
sage green and dust of pink –
sanded and scraped,
pulled back baseboards…
same colours there –
ghosts had penetrated
our psyches.
Chill and fog
cloud my senses –
effective distraction
loneliness holds no sway.
Others speed past,
while I advance,
slow, steady –
drawn by an unknown
Presence, who may
or may not receive me well
at this road’s end
I cannot tell.
Pray indifference
does not await me –
have suffered enough
no stomach for more.
Must stop a moment
and rest…darkness
brings its own brand
of cold… I am weary.
Tomorrow,
I’ll begin anew,
perhaps not so alone,
But loved ones
are preoccupied
others long gone
So the task remains
mine singularly
to further this journey
With faith to carry me
and a prayer for clear
passage to see me through.
(Image from personal collection.)
Armed with plans
and guidelines, we
ready for life’s climb,
unaware that childhood,
untamed and intact,
takes the lead.
Bent –
life’s tribulations weighty
do not confuse this folding
with weakness, I am
worn –
tested resilience
nourishes creativity
I am muse rich,
alive –
alone my story
an illustration,
my life art.
Like Mary Quant
sister had the look –
groomed in etiquette,
poise and fine dining
while my boyish antics
merited mixology prep
one destined for the catwalk
the other a life of servitude
She was swank,
I was bistro.
(Image from personal collection)
Absence fills the silence
with shadowy wings
becomes a raven
sharp-taloned,
razor-beaked
I cower
loss too
immense
for comprehension
would lay my body down
be consumed, but for
the children’e eyes pinning me
their woeful gazes,
begging to be uplifted
I am abandoned
and not
a flicker
called to be
beacon.
(Art from personal collection)
It’s complicated, really, but so much
is defined by the presence of a garage.
Here is a stand-alone, connected by
a breezeway, single-car with storage;
could have been so much more –
had planned for it, but life changes.
Once had an oversized garage – direct
access, housed two vehicles, custom
built – but the cars are gone now, and
the single stands vacant, like my mind.
Except, the other day, I swore I glimpsed
an animal there, perched on the shelving
fierce, cat-like eyes caught in the dim
light of an open doorway – a tigress,
body crouched – I backed away, but
not before claws pierced my imagination
tended to the bleeding, chastising my
foolishness – of course, she isn’t real –
I lost my feminine prowess long ago,
am more of a groundhog now – slow
moving, podgy, sniffing the air for hints
of change, burrowing in the face of trouble.
A family lived here once: a tightly knit
portrait of three, lulled by the protection
offered – no storms to weather –
until the husband left, daughter
in tow; ducked beneath closing
of the automated door –
me, trapped beneath layers of regret
choking on their fumes, homeless.
Would ignore her, except for
those grasping, white-knuckled
fingers pleading for rescue;Â would
shoulder her, but shudder to host such
destruction within my walls,
already robbed of equilibrium
this state of heightened vigilance
a cause for neglecting self – have
humoured one too many advantage-
taker, cannot trust my own instincts
am disillusioned, no longer content
with inconsistencies, need to
confront the condition of my garage,
clean out the accumulation of stored
nonessentials – maybe hold a sale –
whitewash the interior and buy a car.
(Reena’s Exploration challenge this week is the long and short of it. Â The above poem is the long. Â The short follows.)
If life is defined by a garage,
then mine is single, attached,
empty and needing work.
(The original version of this poem was published in August 2016. Â It has been reworked for this edition.)
We’ll buy a boat,
he promised,
spend our days adrift
on a sea of possibilities.
So, she waited,
tethered her hopes
with ropes of whimsy
to a future with sails.
But years passed and
time revealed that words
hold no water, and lies
are no vessel for love.
Now, she contemplates
oceans, photographs
sailboats, docked –
possibilities set aside.