Boxes are filling up around us. We’re making a dent in our to-do lists. Doubt seeps in. Are we doing the right thing?
Then I remember all the reasons behind making this choice and affirm:
We are dismantling one life to build another, purposeful existence.
The movers need to be arranged, and the closets sorted and packed, and when was the last time we bought groceries….
Head and attention are going in too many directions at once, and I’m exhausted before I get started. Might be a little cranky too.
The stress of moving is real.
Oh, the fluidity
Of childhood days
Splashing and skipping along
The path meandering, directionless
When does life acquire edges
Doors and hallways hindering?
Led by asphalt and time clocks
Obligations too numerous to count.
My own body has become a cell
Movement stiffened, mind rigid
It’s those childhood memories
Soul ingrained, keep me fluid.
(Image my own)
You are not responsible for everything. Be accountable. Strive to be self-aware. Know that there is so much more at work than you could ever carry on your own, so don’t even try.
Note to self.
I was just doing the final walkthrough before an Open House (we’re selling our house) when I noticed the Art Room floor was wet. Looking up at the sagging ceiling tile, I hollered for help . Ric came to the rescue, removing the tile and letting the rush of water free.
At our age, we do not move fast, and given the fact we both require use of the chair lift, the clean up was even slower. We did the best we could given the timeline and quit as Real Estate arrived.
“Tell them the plumber has been called”, Ric offered, anticipating people would come.
Exhausted we headed out with dog on board to vacate the house for 2 hours. The rain was pouring down with no relief in sight.
As I type this, the plumber is hunting down the problem. The rain continues. I am feeling waterlogged.
Emotional economy
in state of collapse
What fallacy is this;
what trigger shook me?
Horror-filled insomnia
possesses my psyche
It’s been 50 year since the fall –
why process now?
(Image my own)
Evening light casts a hopeful glow
A gentle summer breeze harmonizes
shadows fascinate, stretching into mystery
My breathing, shallow, betrays the mood
Uncertainty an unforgiving foe –
soul whispers a prayer of longing
A swarm of winged insects dance
where walnut branches part
undaunted by ensuing dark
My wings, folded in doubt’s wake,
weigh heavily on anticipation –
a learned habit of mine
Sun lingers in this season
of emerald charm, and I am reminded
that time evokes change, and I too
Am but a part of nature’s cycle
and what worry robs me of now
will not find its rhythm in Winter’s chill.
(Image my own)
The decision has been made – it is time for us to move on to the next stage of life.
The house will be sold and we shall look for a smaller, rental apartment. It hasn’t been easy coming to this conclusion, and it won’t be easy making the transition, but excitement is part of the equation.
We will be moving back to the city, closer to family, and doctors, and all conveniences.
Now the purge and pack begins.
Acceptance, wisdom, and openness are at my side: three gifts to guide me.
Celebrated 68 years (on this earth) this past weekend with visits from friends and family. Pictured is my husband with our youngest granddaughter. Young and old enjoyed delicious food, laughter, and those precious one-on-one interactions.
