Freak of Nature

Big Bird, peers called me
or Grasshopper – legs longer
than torso, exaggerated
by the platform shoes
of the time.

Jumbo Jet, another moniker
or No Hips, No Ass –
or simply Tree –
my height towering
for my age.

Awkward an understatement –
self-conscious, exposed,
the ridicule outweighing
any nurturing support –
self-declared freak.

(For BrewNSpew’s weekly challenge: awkward)

Treading Trauma

Treading water
where barracudas swarm,
inject a drop of kindness
incite a ravenous threat

Quick the decision to bail,
shed contamination,
resulting terror –
shame exposed.

Now tread slough
longing floored
robed in foreboding
trembling in shadows.

(I have made poor choices in my life, which still haunt my dreams.  My therapist says to focus on the “quick departure”, honour myself for making the right decision in the moment.  Still, guilt lives on.  Such is the nature of trauma.  It lingers in our psyche.  Image from personal collection.)

 

Insecurity Resolved

Unnerved by invitations –
isolation equates with security –
fear the onslaught of questions,
the unleashing of a torrent –
emotions flooding, crashing
through this gated illusion –
best to withdraw.

Withdraw my best
when gated by illusion
crashing, emotions flood –
need to tame this torrent
question the onslaught, brave
insecurity, negate isolation
embrace the invitations.

(Tuesdays, I borrow from my Twitter poems. Follow me @Vjknutson.  The first stanza is the original poem.  I left it here,  then unsatisfied, decided to turn it upside down and create a new outcome. .  Image from personal collection.)

Underestimated

Novice, a word that negates
experience, knowledge, merit –
capability under suspicion.

I novice myself frequently,
as if vulnerability is a sideline
and humility commands denigration.

A tired and weary state –
yes, this is me, new and willing
to learn, but I am not novice.

So before you judge, adjust
your professional spectacles,
snub my potential, hear this:

Value is immeasurable –
unique contributions
enhance collective offerings.

(Reena’s Exploration challenge this week is based on “The Story of An Hour” which challenges us to examine our life and limitations.  I dream over and over again that I have returned to teaching only to find that the years I have put in have been negated by my absence and I have to begin again.  Starting over is not a new theme in my life, but my attitude about is finally changing, as represented in the poem.  Image from personal collection.)

Desert

Take me to the desert
with mountains at our side;
walk with me in shadows
let nature be our guide.

We’ll stroll amongst the cacti
pay homage to the quails;
take me to the desert,
help me gather tales.

The seasons are passing,
we’re running out of time;
take me to the desert;
heal this heart of mine.

(Desert first appeared here in November 2018.  As Winter blows in around us, I think longingly of our time spent in warmer climates. Image from personal collection.)

Story Worthy

Kindness encourages stories
from those too reluctant to share
from youth full of inspiration
from musicians just developing
even from the discouraged
unaware their tale lacks worth.

Each one a record-keeper
harbouring intricate plot lines
uniquely brewed, the telling
a revelation – find a good ear,
or a patient pen, and express.

(Image from personal collection.)