Hiding Shame

When did guilt obviatethe need for sustenance? This deipnophobia paralyzingheartless stares dredge up my truth: insatiable hungerneed to stuff down emotion the certainty that I deservedthe abuse – endless shame My fork traces the outlinesseparates food groups My mind makes mental notesof what I’ll gorge on later. (Deipnophobia is the fear of dining in public. […]

Read More

Toxic

I drink the backwashof hollowed out promises Is it me, invites indifferenceexpectations so low, selfgowned in layered shame? How do I learn otherwisebreak this toxic patternif not in pursuit of love? (Tuesdays I borrow from Twitter @Vjknutson. Image my own)

Read More

Confessions To A Dreamcatcher

Rebellion rages in my veins, Dreamcatcher, so tightly wound I have blocked hopeI want to be good – a good girl –like that man of God saysbut his preaching ways violateprophecies a cover for sinand I am so sullied that I fearlove will distain me. How did I get here, Dreamcatcherchildhood a lost notion – […]

Read More

Oppression’s Child

This outer toughness just conditioninga baby alligatorthat’s me Raised in a swampEat or be eaten!family mantra, andDeal with it! I know it’s a lotto take insee the disbeliefin civilized eyes Resistance to oppression begets deeper woundsFear taught me wellSurvival, they say, of the fittest. (For Reena’s Xploration challenge: featured image is prompt.)

Read More

Basement

Concrete is cold, imposingdoes nothing for aesthetics At least we’re protected,I tell the littles, ignoring Snot dripping, slimeoozing from unsealedwindowsills, cobwebsand bits of shedding pink It’s the best I can do:four walls and a roof. Except the ceilingis bulging, mold and rotcertain to rain down on us While upstairs, the manignores the leaks, luxuriatesin his […]

Read More

Just Saying

I wade through the muckof your vocal excretionsanxious to mend the schism What species of humanare you, would fabricatesuch lies, impose such pain And what species am Ithat would tolerate it;strive for reparation? (Image my own)

Read More

Love Lessons

Had a weird sort of lexicon the man who professed to be my dad – Clamped in his chokehold he’d demand words of devotion Became inured to this dichotomy – spent a lifetime searching for love – Just the right balance of cruelty and kind. (Tuesdays, I borrow from Twitter @Vjknutson.  Sketch mine.)

Read More

Adultery

Mistake Beg forgiveness Repeat Appearances sanitize past Push dirt under the rug Smother recall Reason can be fraud common sense out of order Suspicions merit an ear, listen over din of betrayal. (For Reena’s Exploration Challenge #135:  quotation.  “Always listen twice.  First what’s being said, then who said it.”  Image my own.)

Read More

Coming of Age

Green eyes captivate, he whispers, warm hand resting on youthful thigh Stomach somersaults reviled by whiskey breath yellowed fingers clutching Not these eyes! I stand tossing my drink in his face; coming of age moment.

Read More

Fight For Truth

Legends make and legends break and some are clouds for truth… We stalk fame Wear blinders Deny greed Worship lust Somber propositions streaked with blood outsmart watchful eyes Run to save the children those vulnerable ones wounds still tender No matter how guarded no matter how impenetrable the walls expose the beast, fight the devil […]

Read More