Conscience clear,
even circumspect,
no hidden motives,
just a desire for closeness,
an intimacy only two
can share, and yet
even as you approach
I feel my waters
clouding, doubts
scurrying across
surfaces…

Conscience clear,
even circumspect,
no hidden motives,
just a desire for closeness,
an intimacy only two
can share, and yet
even as you approach
I feel my waters
clouding, doubts
scurrying across
surfaces…

Even as fingers – swift
and seductive – thieved,
she moaned invitation,
ignored the warnings
so eager to please,
so hungry for love
He didn’t need a weapon –
the flash of iced blue eyes
and a throaty whisper
rendered her compliant
so eager to please,
so hungry for love
He was pro, conscience
numbed by a list of victims –
so many wasted lives,
faceless towns left behind
so eager to please,
so hungry for love
She blamed it on the passion –
the sudden confusion, misplacing
things, money – her thoughts
blinders set on a glowing future
so eager to please,
so hungry for love
Blamed herself in the aftermath,
would rather he’d used a knife,
slashed her body – violence
less shameful than this
so eager to please,
so hungry for love.
Natural light preferable
to artificial – not the harsh
fullness of noonday sun
but softly filtered rays –
luxurious, inviting.
Love too, should be subdued,
gentle as a zephyr, not mythical
but yielding, mindful;
not worshipful nor boastful,
but comforting, warm
I am waning light,
the mistral wind wafting,
no longer a force of nature –
but smoke, spiraling,
vanishing into non-existence
And yet, even as shadows
spread, I yearn –
heart beating true,
not lost, not forgotten,
but withdrawn, humbled
passion mellowed
by toil of constructing walls –
grit and tar – scar’s long buried,
save the limping gait
of a ghost.
(This poem, worming its way into my thoughts all day, took shape when Sammi Cox’s Weekend Writing Prompt appeared:  zephyr.  Image is from personal collection.)
Suspect
these sentiments,
gnarled and ungrateful,
only serve to tip the scale
in favour of cynicism
have, therefore,
decided on self-
imposed quarantine;
will be keeping thoughts
to myself, thank you.
Suffice to say
that having confronted
multiple betrayals,
and insurmountable
heartache, all pointing
vile accusations
at a lack of discernment,
and questionable self-worth,
I am currently not imbibing
romantic dribble –
Oh, dear! I’ve said too much.
(Inspired by the daily promptings of: Fandango (suspect), Ragtag Community (scale), Daily Addictions (intimidate), and Sammi Cox’ Weekend Writing Prompt (quarantine).
Image produced by yours truly.)
If searching for love
was like shopping for shoes,
I’d fixate on the simplest
of finds, choosing practicality
over fashion flair.
My preference is for earthy,
unassuming: plain is fine
as long as the structure
gives me room to breath –
no grasping too tight.
If I shopped for love,
like I do for shoes,
I’d ignore those pushy
sales lines, opt instead
for a supportive sole,
settle for guaranteed comfort
over flashy heels, can’t bear
the instability of pedestals,
love flattery like most,
but need to feel grounded.
No doubt I’d question
my selection, offer it up
to my children for feedback
be mocked, dissuaded,
put it back and search anew,
discover futility in my seeking,
realize that I need new love
like I need new shoes –
only a foolish indulgence
for a woman who lives in bed.
(This poem, inspired by a dream, was penned when I was still bed bound, two years ago. Â Hope it made you smile. Â If you found yourself on the hunt for love, what would you look for?
p.s. my husband fits the criteria still, lol.)
Console me
when life, upended
shuns and ridicules
let me know I’ll be alright
Step out
of picket-fence thinking,
find beauty in my uniqueness,
show me that love has no boundaries
Teach me
to treasure all that I am
even if that all is beyond
your comprehension
Grow with me
encourage exploration
demonstrate courage
in face of the unforeseeable.
(A Child Responds follows yesterday’s poem: A Mother Asks. Both poems were inspired by a post I wrote a few years back: No One Will Ever Love You)
Who instigated the abandonment?
It’s an ugly question –
manifests pretensions –
both sides righteous,
blinded…
when the rage subsides
faith will intervene,
and acceptance –
a milestone,
will springboard
recovery, victims
voices gaining clarity,
intent amended,
launching into love
once again.
A tragic flaw
does not always a hero make.
She thought it did –
despite her beauty,
despite the Zeus’ who pursued her;
she set her sights on the unattainable.
Was it self-degradation or the sting
of a jilted spouse that tarnished her –
either way she lost her voice,
her autonomy shattered.
He tolerated her –
to a point – let her fawn
perversely intrigued,
no doubt flattered,
by her willingness to cloy.
Love was not in his DNA –
he lacked the missing component
so wrapt in his own drama;
he had no empathy –
no capacity for compassion.
Was it Nemesis, or
did they just reap what they’d sewn –
for theirs was a tragedy of Greek proportions –
the more distant he grew
the more she desired him
like a flower, too delicate to grasp
the less she demanded for herself
the less visible she was to him –
meaningless words lost on deaf ears
Sadly, theirs is a common tale –
though mythical in its telling, the patterns
repeat – love continues to elude.

(Pretty sure you can guess today’s prompt. Â Hope you enjoyed.)
A look back to two years ago. Sometimes we need the perspective of the rear-view image to put the present in better focus. How far we have come. (Photo from our earlier, healthier days.)
The quest for love
an uphill climb,
the footholds
loose and failing
Scrapes heal, and
hearts yearning
begin again, forget
the falls, aspire
Unconditional love
a dizzying height,
soulmates and
pre-destination
Goals for romantics,
by my heart reaches
for a memory, a return
to the beginning
When kisses warm
and embraces strong
conveyed desirability,
love’s reverence a peak
much steeper to attain
when age, in its folly
lusts after a youth’s game,
time a cruel intervener.