Tag: aging

Sheltered

“If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, Infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things thro’ narrow chinks of his cavern.” – William Blake

Weathered the would that frames this perception,

once painted with optimism, long worn.


How bright the ideals of youth, now blurred,

colours stripped, raw intention bared –

Life mocks these aged perspectives

old structures fail, light dims with neglect

Still the heart beats solid, hope like putty

sticking to the sills, solidifying half-truths.

How deluded am I, trapped within walls

defined by out of focus panes, separated

From a reality that would behold me

fragmented or whole, and who will ever know

Have not the wherewithal to strip back

old mindsets, repaint the trimmings

Am content to dwell behind screens

of my own making, distorted but secure.

(Image my own)

Frost Bitten

Gnarly, these withered limbs,
this vessel more rigidity than flow,
Winter upon me – a permanent clouding

Sunnier days passed –
oh how vivid the imagination
when blue skies met green grass,
no hindrances

Old dreams hover, tethered to fences –
defences to camouflage vulnerability,
offences to keep my paths cleared

Find balance in isolation –
an old tree, past her prime

Would cut loose this precarious hold
on all things fantastical, but
fear the act a harbinger

So, I bide my days
in this frigid limbo,
and hold on.

(Originally appeared January, 2019. Image my own)

Of Light

There is light in unknowns –
at least I project it there –
caught between the current
ashen landscape and the achings
of a solitary childhood…

I like to think faith guides me
but she is muted like the gardens
of my dreams, more ethereal
than palpable and I need concrete
have waited too long for that train

of certainty to carry me away…
course it never comes, there is no easy
just a slow, steady plodding: a pace
that age has settled on; so I turn
to inner landscapes, imagination
remembering colour…and yes, light.

(Image my own creation)

Age Has Her Own Quest

What is it that a woman of maturity quests for?

Autonomy: to feel that her decisions/wants/needs
are not overshadowed by the dictates of another,
or by a past that is forever looming.

Empowerment: to know, once and for all, that
the victim is laid to rest, so that she can embrace
her authentic self.

Inner peace: to live without guilt or the need for
permission. To be able to forgive and self and other
in order to be free. To trust, innately, her own
inner resources, releasing fear’s hold.

Sacredness: to stand firmly upon the Earth,
breathe freely, and engage with life. To make
a difference.

Celebration: to live with anticipation, surprise,
and ultimately joy.

Connection: to recognize in each living moment
that none of the above is obtained in a bubble.
I quest for true connection. The bravest quest of all.

(Reading through old posts I came across one from November, 2014 which inspired this write. Image my own.)

Too Old?

She is young,
this artist-self
celebrating discovery

He chastises enthusiasm,
this intellect-self, favours
logic over emotions

I use disability as an excuse
Accept intellect’s restraints
Ignore encouragement
Refrain from submitting
Halter progress

Youth has ambition
her paint spattered hands
grasp at opportunity –
her tender heart
emits a joyful tune..

…but age,
having abandoned ambition,
is hard of hearing.

(Art mine)