Category: poetry

Thwarted

Have been unearthing the boxes
of my subconscious, clearing ill-
cast tales, intent on an end goal –
restitution at very least, but

my sister, no stomach for process,
wants to suction up the guck –
impatient for a quick cleanse –
plugs the workings:  therapy,

a finicky machine, falters,
water oozes between cracks;
we are flooded by mutual
wounds, personal emoting

ankle-deep in truths neither
can bear, waders, all thoughts
of sanctity dissolving, and I
espy cobwebs forming, corners

once cleansed – dysfunction’s
mockery of hope – reminder
that when roots are rotten,
scars are reluctant to heal.

A Wounded Pair

Depression desires a move –
maybe east, where the sun rises
and views are more picturesque

but espoused to Disability ensures
limitations – no multi-level dwelling
just a single story, easy access home

Surely, there is a place, where both
tales can co-exist, and Depression’s
suppressed flamboyance can soar

and Disability’s plentiful talent
can escape the darkened confines
of four dimly lit walls, be witnessed

She is actress and he is victim, and
a fresh start is required – ownership
that’s less costly – discovery a possibility

gorgeous, inebriating abundance –
a foundation of hope – no more
lowering themselves to circumstance

Yet, both are married to responsibility,
clutch it with terror, personal cravings
a menace – store their dreams in boxes

basement buried – the family home
a weighty treasure – ignore the niggling
call to downsize – prefer to embrace

their fateful fortunes with loyalty –
a wounded pair, reluctant to let go
fear an insurmountable barricade.
(Image: skydancingblog.com)

Contemplating Confinement

Is this clawing essential?
Are we creating a practical life,
a persuasive existence;
or are we restrained by judgments?

Do we value joint holdings,
going places  – are we two wheels
pulling this oversized work in progress?

Is there space for support,
to land, and register once
on board – a must-have meeting
of the minds?  Or are we cramped,
piece by piece, to each their own –
equals, wrestling with what’s important?

Can I conceive – while pleading my case –
whose rights decide, how we preserve
our assets?  Risky when both charges
are unstable:  a study in adaptability

a hard trial – requires a negotiation tool
for surfacing needs, to lift us from
our limitations, help us confront
mirrored images, perceptions
battling for imperatives.

Eventually, our laboured intentions
will birth proof of the worthiness
of this journey, that storing family
differences and moving precariously
forward will succeed, if we are committed,
flexible, and willing to co-create.

(Image: aboutyourrelationship.wordpress.com)

Resignation

Tried to drop in, visit the past –
hoped to resurrect old passions –
all that remains are intellectual
reserves, in need of costumes
to enact a play written without me;
I’d help out but have neither
the resources nor the physical
ability to lower or raise myself
to such expectations.

It’s all so unnatural, this pandering
to an ideal, this self defined by roles
and education:  this soulless state.

So I caught a train out of there –
boarded before I realized
that in my already off-balance state
the movement would throw me,
fell, cried, met with further coldness
should have taken a bus,
buried myself amidst the nameless
masses, too anxious to signal stop,
would shamelessly ride to the end
sobbing even harder, be expelled
by a driver, hardened by the reek
of human neglect, find myself
at the corner of what was
and a swift passage to nowhere.

Better to accept this stranded isolation –
nearby places out of reach – too weak,
too frail to stand – this place that is home.

 

 

Demon Prowler

It stalks – colourless,
soulless, skin of leather,
ears tufted – a demon
predator crouching
in the private places
awaiting bloody attack

A wife reigns in instinct
ignores niggling senses
guards her loyalty –
vaguely speaks to spouse
of fears, accepts a shrug
as compliance, relaxes

Routine a barrier to what
lies within, darkness waiting,
watching – convinces herself
serenity is a state of mind,
while her husband seeks
a more youthful companion

Has plotted his escape –
accomplices secured –
intends to bulldoze
the marriage – feeds
the beast with covert
manipulations, lies

Inexperience lures the
maiden, sandwiched
between his lust and
her hope, willing to risk
precariousness, encroach
on marital privacy, bait

for what lurks there,
impatient for the kill;
but who will fall victim,
whose heart be torn
in irreconcilable pieces
when betrayal strikes.

(Image: mixtapetherapy.wordpress.com)

 

 

 

Tender Hearts Fall

Here’s a boy, tender
and raw, heart exposed
awkward innocence
blocking his intention

Here’s a man, eyes fiery
coals, hands coarse ,
face leather,  smoky
words coaxing affection

Here’s a girl, book smart
heart uncertain, romance
a fluttery desire, caught
between the two, torn

The boy averts his eyes
fears she’ll see the raging
in his loins, read obsession
in his longing, reject him

The man takes her hand,
softly traces the outline
of her face; slow, seductive,
draws her into his mystery

She is a two-headed lamb,
ponders the breadth of
the boy’s shoulders, knows
his future is a straight line

Hormones rage at man’s
touch, the way his eyes
devour her, the magical
nuances in his voice

Two paths, she thinks,
two diverging outcomes;
the boy holds himself erect
feels his fate is decided

the man lays his head
in her lap, thick waves
of black thrilling her
skin – a dead-end street

Is it pride that makes
the boy look away, she
wonders, or am I not
good enough – tainted?

She turns to the older
man, smiles, pull him
to her and surrenders,
darkness a familiar place.

(Image:  mixtapetherapy.wordpress.com)

Relationship Saboteur

Open to sisterhood,
letting my guard down,
pledging reliability

Just can’t find suitably
sparkly holder to house
my pragmatism, hate

being second-rate
when it comes to
abundance; I am

solid, ebony, earthen
know that I have value
but cannot locate it –

maybe a little contraband
would loosen my subconscious
permit release, have been

the subject of anti-social
musings, imposed by a
mother, overwhelmed

who cared to be with a
narcissist; have speculated,
imbibed, cried righteous

intolerance – all a hunt
for independence, an exit,
reversal of tracks, gears

turning; I am charcoal
shining, aged, more than
this singular identity

useful to excess, yet
unfamiliar with protocols
suspicious of kindness

would sell everything
I have, give up the search
reveal a playful ( lapsed )

side, revisit old strengths
to discover a new order
but the former glitter

like surplussed sequins
puckering plenitude –
without light, I am worn

questioning widowhood
once married to intention
now misplaced, purpose

stashed under so much
debris, would need willing
interloper to rifle through

help me find my dreams:
shared responsibility implied
only betrayers welcome.

(Image: www.personalityprogram.com)

 

 

Hatched

She’s in the kitchen
cleaning, prepping
sweetness;  wishes

to nurture childlike
longings – sugar laden
gifts, honeyed chops

hooks her men with
culinary preciseness
as legend prescribes

wants a strong, reliable
type to stir her ovaries
keep her dishing up love

disapproval, like raw egg
drips off her china plates
shame of misadventures
she cannot scrub away

only serves tea now,
the smell of liquor –
mingled with cigarette
and lecherous calloused
hands turns her stomach

avoids the coffee maker
in the same way, despises
the way the bitter brew
makes her head spin –
wits need to be in order

has settled now as hostess
caters to near strangers
whose attention, riveted
by television screens, are

lulled by the rhythmic
sounds of her sanitizing
while eggs cook on stove,
dreams of romance shelved.

(Image: bunnysvintagevictory.blogspot.com)

 

 

Unbridled

Tender as a fledgling, angelic
curls confrontational, she bears
emotions with courage, femininity
unkempt, pridefully engages
creatures – pests to most – believes

in messengers, blessed with manna,
heaven-sent; draws her strength
from within, a daring soul, plunges
deep, pursues wholeness – cherished
vulnerability, unpolished, loyal

mimics nature, her innocence persuasive,
fear and protectiveness retreat, helpless
in face of the adventures that call to her;
she is submerged, infiltrating enchantment,
unruly – does not measure progress by scars

unaware of wounding, responds only
to the magical sense of play – a limbo –
instinctively trusting, sweet, views the
world from perches treetop high, wills
herself to fly with dragonfly wings.

In time, innocence will be intercepted
by practicality: Fate’s swift hand cutting
her down, she will be victim, react to
adversity, learn to mother, the wildness
of her youth chiseled by expectations

She will learn to wade through swamps,
acknowledge pain and her own inadequacy,
overcome and face life anew, the memory
of a freer time, a more wily self, fleeting –
the child in her more myth than memory.

(Photo from Pinterest, attributed to:
Joanne Quirante Escober)