Descending
into the mythical
entranced
spurred by
severity of
current challenge
Call it fantasy
but attempting
movement is
destroying
my passage
I am pulling,
shattering
this barricade
of a life; blue
progressing:
ocean bound.
(Mermaid Dreams was originally written in December of 2016, two years bedridden. Only in the dreamtime was I whole and capable of overcoming. Dreams are one thing I can talk about for thirty minutes without preparation: my challenge this week. Image my own.)
Impulse once drove my plunges –
glorious confidence propelling
fortuitous dives – unknown waters
an adventure to be conquered.
Even with onset of anxiety
I’d stalk shorelines, ignore
whispering of  catastrophe,
hold my breath and submerge.
Doubt would follow determination,
but buoyed by adversity, I’d swim,
force commanding adaptation –
I’d find my mermaid’s breath.
Motherhood introduced constraint
called forth sensibility and caution –
whimsy replacing practicality,
a shedding of iridescent tail.
I only dig in dirt now –
ground my offspring to earthly
forays, forbid capriciousness,
convince myself I’m solid.
Absentminded burrowing –
(corners of compulsion)
reveal abandoned passages –
old waterways exhumed.
Proclaimed pragmatism falters,
spontaneity takes hold, transforms
I am nymph again – free floating
Neptune’s daughter resuscitated.
(This poem, originally entitled Chasing Mermaids, first appeared in September, 2015. Â It has been edited. Â Image is my own.)
One Woman's Quest 