Chasing Mermaids

Impulse use to drive my plunges
unrestrained confidence propelling
fortuitous dives – unknown waters
an adventure to be conquered.

Even when anxiety came along
stalked the shoreline in horror,
assured of catastrophe (or worse),
I”d hold my breath and submerge.

Doubt would follow determination,
buoyed by adversity, swimming
forcefully, commanding adaptation –
I’d find my mermaid’s breath.

Motherhood brought restraint
called forth sensibility and caution,
replaced whimsy with practicality
shed the iridescent tail.

I only dig in dirt now –
ground my offspring to earthly
forays, forbid capriciousness,
convince myself I’m solid.

Absentminded burrowing –
(corners of compulsion)
reveal abandoned passages –
old waterways exhumed.

Proclaimed pragmatism falters;
spontaneity descends,  transforms
I am nymph again – free floating
Neptune’s daughter resuscitated.

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VJ

Permission to write, paint, and imagine are the gifts I gave myself when chronic illness hit - a fair exchange: being for doing. Relevance is an attitude. Humour essential.

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