Collared and Distant

I side with mundanity
caution-led momentum
still, anxiety interjects

Every day presents beauty
wonder, and where am I?
Slinking away from some black dog –
collared and distant

Life offers me a bridge
and I shrink, ducking into
sheltered viewpoints
praying the moment
passes me by

No wonder the black dog
catches me, straining its leash
to sniff this trembling old woman
its handler oblivious to the
fear mounting in the room

I will project the spots of the past
into silent scenarios, and
brace myself as if riding a tiger –
unprepared and hanging on for life

Avoidance is a fool’s game
for life is challenge
and if I’m honest
it’s not the dark that quickens
but rather that which resides within
 
I am the black dog –
collared and distant
I am my spotted past
and I am, in essence
the spirit of the tiger

And I am the very shelter
that I seek
open-doored
and ever-present
for every weary passerby

My walls may be worn
my countenance aging
but I am not without purpose

I shall seek out bridges
and contain these nerves
and cross into the unknown
instinct and intuition intact

Leave anxiety,
collared and distant
behind.

(Image my own)

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VJ

Permission to write, paint, and imagine are the gifts I gave myself when chronic illness hit - a fair exchange: being for doing. Relevance is an attitude. Humour essential.

20 thoughts on “Collared and Distant”

  5. Potent! And I recognize the “black dog” !

    The dog in my schooling years was black literally and happily wanted no contact with me. I thus grew up keeping my distance from dogs …

    Decades later my husband has softened my aversions – now living with 2 large dogs – now seeing “dog” in this poem as metaphor for other aversions – maybe I’m due a few more embraces with “unthinkables”?

    Jazz

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    1. I think we’re always ready to cross those bridges and embrace more. This poem came from a dream (as always) and I often think of the ‘black dog’ as a euphemism for depression. Nice to hear from as always. Any travels in the plans?

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