Formative years were more destruct
than construct; contradictions riddled
the foundation of our familial structure:
one man tyrannized five females while
in the news, women marched for equality;
called the likes of him a male chauvinist.
Aunt drove a forklift truck, looked like a man,
chalked one up for women’s liberation, didn’t
talk about her sexuality; shadow of illegality
hovering around her – no one dared to ask.
At nine, I questioned the fairness of being
born a girl in a man’s world, felt impassioned
by feminist cries, yet feared my mom would
leave the nest, abandon baking, domestics;
leave us to fend for ourselves – the warm waft
of fresh-baked goods greeting us each day, gone.
Watched my sisters flaunt their womanly ways
for virile young men who flocked to see bikini
clad bodies, ripe and tanned by the sun – who
was reducing whom to sex objects? And when
my mother’s family came to visit, why were the
men’s hands so invasive, their tongues equally
misplaced, and was this what women in the streets
were crying out against? I wanted to be free, explore
my future prospects – open road ahead – but Mother
said boys will be boys, and men don’t like smart
women, and better to drop out of school at sixteen,
get a secretarial job, and be ready when your prince
arrives – so I rebelled, cut my hair, flaunted my
intelligence, spoke up about inconsistencies,
such as why is a God a He, and why Aunt didn’t
ever date – did feminist mean celibate? and why
when women were so oppressed and men had
all the power, did my father wish he could be one?
Formative years more destruct than construct;
a deviate imprint tainting normalcy’s prospects.
(A 60’s Childhood first appeared here in September, 2016. My challenge this week is story. Click on the link to join in. Computer is currently in the shop – so I have set this post up in advance. Sorry if it takes me a bit to get back to you. Image from personal collection.)
Powerful, and so many parts of it ring true to my 60’s growing up. Thank you so much for noting that it wasn’t all flower power and bell bottoms!
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No it was not! Thanks.
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Superbly written V.J., sometimes I wonder whether anything has actually changed for woman, especially with middle eastern and Asian women ……..
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Thanks Ivor. Things change very slowly, it seems.
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More destruct than construct. Really sums it up for me as well…a childhood ball of confusion story. Powerful poem V.J.
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Thank you. Families stayed behind closed doors and struggled greatly I think
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Wonderful story VJ. Sometimes I think women are still struggling even after all these years of burning bras, breaking glass ceilings and #MeToo movement. The rich and powerful men are still abusing and exploiting young girls. In some respects they are still men’s property. 😢
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I agree Christine. We did so much to advance ourselves, but the patriarchy holds fast. Thanks for your comments.
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Love the picture you paint of a time, that has changed dramatically, but not really.
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Still confusing for those growing up, I’m sure.
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Love this poem!
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Thank you!
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It’s interesting how you put everything into perspective, I loved it.
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Thank you, Susan.
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