Intangibles

Mother followed all the trends –
Scarsdale and grapefruit diets,
minis and maxis,
platforms and pumps –
reaching for an ideal
my child’s mind
could not comprehend

Father dreamt of a voice makeover
had flown his ancestral roots
in search of…what?
I did not know

I learned that men
were to be pleased,
and compassion
was a woman’s role
and it was folly to hazard
confrontation when alcohol
was in the mix,

Intangible as life was
I deduced that secrets –
the avoidance of scandal –
rendered women ineffective

and by the very circumstance
of my birth, I was tainted,
weighted by shame
destined to endure
pain as love
invested in
my worthlessness

Except life is evolution
and rage emerges
from oppression
and conviction
smashes the impotence
of ideals, embraces
the abstracts
of fluidities,

and merging out of shame
I see that struggle
is opportunity

and that rewriting legacies
is an honourable goal
and I do have power
in any given moment…

only wish
I had known it
sooner.

(Art my own)

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VJ

Permission to write, paint, and imagine are the gifts I gave myself when chronic illness hit - a fair exchange: being for doing. Relevance is an attitude. Humour essential.

43 thoughts on “Intangibles”

  6. Oh, so much of what I have grown into, even after retirement, I wish I had known earlier. Then again, maybe I just wasn’t ready. I enjoyed the details of your poem, VJ, and absolutely adore that art. So imaginative.

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  9. You have healed my heart today in more ways than one. Thank you, for your writing, as it guided me to acknowledge a parallel life and helped me to feelings of acceptance and strength within myself. I send all the joy your way!

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      1. See? There’s that! And it’s exactly what our daughter would describe as an “intergenerational healing moment”. Being intentional about what NOT to do. Hugs to you, VJ. 🥰

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  17. There are days when I reflect back and think, wow I’d love a do over for some things. I appreciated the reflective tone. This poem is meant to be read aloud!

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