Mother followed all the trends –
Scarsdale and grapefruit diets,
minis and maxis,
platforms and pumps –
reaching for an ideal
my child’s mind
could not comprehend
Father dreamt of a voice makeover
had flown his ancestral roots
in search of…what?
I did not know
I learned that men
were to be pleased,
and compassion
was a woman’s role
and it was folly to hazard
confrontation when alcohol
was in the mix,
Intangible as life was
I deduced that secrets –
the avoidance of scandal –
rendered women ineffective
and by the very circumstance
of my birth, I was tainted,
weighted by shame
destined to endure
pain as love
invested in
my worthlessness
Except life is evolution
and rage emerges
from oppression
and conviction
smashes the impotence
of ideals, embraces
the abstracts
of fluidities,
and merging out of shame
I see that struggle
is opportunity
and that rewriting legacies
is an honourable goal
and I do have power
in any given moment…
only wish
I had known it
sooner.
(Art my own)
this is a very lovely poem… and I would like to say: it’s never too late…., but I also felt if only I knew sooner…
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The paradox of life. Thanks for reading and commenting.
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This is such a wonderful poem, VJ. So powerful.
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Thank you!
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❤️
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Great poem
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Thank you. Nice to meet you.
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🤗🤗
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Thanks Jon
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So many things we wished we had known sooner.
Wonderful poem of evolution.
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Thank you!
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Oh, so much of what I have grown into, even after retirement, I wish I had known earlier. Then again, maybe I just wasn’t ready. I enjoyed the details of your poem, VJ, and absolutely adore that art. So imaginative.
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Undoubtedly, we weren’t ready. Thanks LuAnne
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“Only wished that I had known it sooner,” indeed.
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😊💕
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Wisdom comes from a life well lived! Great post VJ!
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Thank you!
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You’re welcome!
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You have healed my heart today in more ways than one. Thank you, for your writing, as it guided me to acknowledge a parallel life and helped me to feelings of acceptance and strength within myself. I send all the joy your way!
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Glad that my words helped. Thanks for sharing.
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I think the realization that we do have power, often comes later in life
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Agreed, Sadje
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👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
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I hope my own daughters have learned from my mistakes. I’ve certainly made enough of them. (K)
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Me too! How could we not.
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I know just what you are talking about in this post and know I have been there with you.
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Thanks Anne
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I think most of us come to life’s wisdom later than we would like.
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Truth
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Thanks for sharing a powerful message!
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😊🙏
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Very thought-provoking. “Men are to be pleased” That brings back memories I always disagreed about with my mother.
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I tried to fight it too, as an adolescent, but some patterns are hard to break
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As you say…if we only knew then.
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This really struck me, VJ, about your mom…and mine. A note of recognition: …”reaching for an ideal my child’s mind could not comprehend”. 💕
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At least she taught me what I didn’t want to do as a mother….
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See? There’s that! And it’s exactly what our daughter would describe as an “intergenerational healing moment”. Being intentional about what NOT to do. Hugs to you, VJ. 🥰
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There are days when I reflect back and think, wow I’d love a do over for some things. I appreciated the reflective tone. This poem is meant to be read aloud!
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Thanks Heather. I have to remind myself not to get stuck in the wishful thinking.
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That can definitely be a depressing rabbit hole.
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Evolution from hard lessons
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Yes! Better than the alternative
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Indeed
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