Oh, Canada!

Welcome to my country,
there’s so much to explore.
We really are a friendly bunch
but there’s a few things we abhor

So, we’ve written specific rules
for our visitors to keep in mind –
above and beyond the expected
these oddities are considered crime.

Please refrain from removing
a band-aid while in a public place,
and it’s more than just offensive
to fart when in another’s space.

Should you happen to encounter
our most coveted royal, the Queen,
avoid startling or scaring her, or
your arrest will cause a scene.

Driving a sleigh down the highway
may seem a ludicrous thing to do,
however; it’s actually acceptable if
your horse sports bells more than two.

Taking your feet off bicycle pedals,
is illegal in Ottawa, our capital town,
and riding through Sudbury with a siren
will elicit more than just a frown.

While sightseeing with your mother
in Toronto – our largest city by far –
no matter how much she provokes you,
save any expletives for inside the car.

Climbing trees, tying laces, and even
painting wooden ladders, all have laws
you’ll need to abide, so next time you’re
in Canada, before you act, give pause.

And for goodness sake, be sure to
visit our beauteous province of B.C. –
but leave your gun at home, for
killing a Sasquatch is illegal, you see.

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(The final prompt invites a little humour – to write about strange historical facts or laws.  These little known Canadian laws are courtesy of narcity.com)

Published by

VJ

Permission to write, paint, and imagine are the gifts I gave myself when chronic illness hit - a fair exchange: being for doing. Relevance is an attitude. Humour essential.

18 thoughts on “Oh, Canada!”

  1. Thanks for the humour. I really enjoyed your post!
    In Toronto, with fireworks booming in the background, I wish you a Happy Canada Day ‘in all of us command’ whatever that means…

    Liked by 1 person

      2. There was a tv show that outlined some really crazy laws that were still on the books around the world. Some were so outdated but so funny! I couldn’t imagine living by most of them.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. As a teacher, I would give my students an assignment to research city bylaws – quite fun. Seems outdated laws are just forgotten, not scratched.

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  6. How marvelous! Please send it to the Canadian Tourism Board for inclusion in all of their pamphlets. I can’t imagine a better way to make visitors aware of the local laws! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

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