That tone –
teeth clenched
lips taut
the coldness
in your gaze
I swallow
anxiously
shifting
foot to foot
await
raise of hand
fist clenched
in ball of rage
smugness
vanquished
in ominous wait
but you pause
step back
straighten
mouth relaxing
into a grin
with a twinkle
admit
you might have
done the same.
(Written for All The Shoes I Wear, whose prompt is ominous.
I was holding my breath until the end! An evocative piece!
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Thank you.
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I wasn’t expecting the shift at the end, and I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it until I read your comment to Ivor.
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Many times it ended differently.
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Interesting! Did you work on different endings as part of revision when you wrote the poem, or did you go back to the poem after some time had passed and change the ending because it no longer seemed right?
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Altering the ending was a conscious choice. I get tired of the same old endings, and this is part of my therapeutic process. Thanks for noticing Liz.
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Fabulously executed entry! Bravo!
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Thanks Laura! Just like old times!
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your imagery of suspense is superb, and the finale is silently authoritative
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Thanks Ivor. It’s based on the first time my father caught me drinking under age. Thought he would kill me.
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Excellent poem 👍
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Thank you!
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You’re welcome!
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Very evocative…you paint great pictures!
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Thank you!
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